Facing the face

    Of late I get more frustrated particularly when dealing with people. I like everyone talking about me but not when they talk something which is not so good in me. Now, hearing the conversation I could clearly see things are not going in my way, wish I could interrupt them, because if I keep ignoring such things it may go worse in near future. I have to do something to stop it. I decided to make it clear and explain everything, this is the last chance I got to make them understand my position.

    I took a deep breath walked vigorously and stood in front of my family. All of a sudden, after seeing me standstill in middle of the hall, they cut the conversation and glanced at me questioningly, seems like they didn’t expect me in here. I made eye contact with my family as though to warn them for upcoming stream of words. I busted out, told everything, everything what I prepared to say without giving any margin of chance for them to respond, words gushed from my mouth, delivered what I intended to say. After my speech entire home remains silence, I’m pretty much sure I did a convincing job.

    My throat went dry, ran to the table, sipped water swiftly and came back to previous spot. But unfortunately outcome of my speech was something different from what I anticipated. My mother looked into my eyes and gave a soulful smile. On the other side I saw my father showing his teeth, I guess he is also smiling at me. During when I was trying to take my eyes off from my dad, my mom looked under my waist and said.

“Vino, looks heavy, I think it’s time to change diaper” she stepped down from sofa.

“Aargh, wait, no, not now, wait…” I screamed and started running, (not sure how much she understood). Mom came near running behind, I ran almost every corners in home, under the table, chair, in the end she got me when I was trying to get inside a cupboard in bedroom. Period.

“Henceforth don’t tell him scary stories Karthik” asked Sudha.

“Do you think that was scary? Don’t be silly Sudha.”

    Mom and Dad again started the similar conversation, this time I am not going to intrude them. I am going to mind my own business, let me just sit in my chair and play with my Ankylosaurus.

“You don’t understand toddlers Karthik, they get afraid for even small things, some of the stories you told might not be a scary one for us, but it may be scary for him.”

“Well, you may be correct, I have to stop telling those”

“Also we have to be very cautious about what we are seeing on T.V. Now he is grasping every minute things what he sees”

“Yes… yes… now could I connect Sudha, the other days I was watching some scary content on TV, I was under impression that he was only playing with his toys”

“Let’s watch how he is sleeping today and please, please don’t ever watch any scary or adult content on T.V while he is awake.”

“Sure, Sure. I promise”

    Truly I wish not to say this. But I just tell only to you, please keep it secret. Last night I had a bad dream, I screamed and got up from bed and cried. Mom and dad came after hearing my cry, dad gave me warm cuddles, and mom made a soothing music evidently both pampered me. Looks like I cried almost the whole night. The problem is you know what? It is not the bad dream, my parents are incapable of understanding what I was saying.

    The other day dad understood one of the word I spoke, which is “Car“. Almost entire day mom and dad were excited and wanted me to repeat the word “Car” again and again by showing my toy car and asking “What is this? Tell us what is this?” It was a boring tiring day, but it didn’t stop there, both called my grandparents and, then I said the word “Car” to phone too. It seems like everyone celebrated that event.

You know what? It is supposed to be me. I am the one who has to celebrate, I deserve more.

“Sudha you too, don’t make him afraid by telling about monsters especially when feeding him”

“When I was young my mother asks me to pray before going to bed, so I don’t get any bad dream. Starting from today will make Vino to practice this before bed”

    That is it. I cannot sit here anymore. I ran to mom and dad again and said “Dad, that funny looking loathsome dreary pity face with scares and wounds who has uncomfortable rock like teeth, dirty tongue and mucus sort of thing all over the face, mouth full of fruit jam, few patches of long grey hair here and there, eyes without iris sometimes dark and hollow replacing eyes, on top of it dislocated nose and ears. Do you think I get scared by looking at it dad? No dad, not me. But you do.”

“Errr, come on guys why are you smiling at me?”

“I am serious mom”

“I can’t help it, let me take my seat” I said low and set back.

    Mom and dad thinks I got frightened by seeing a face of monster or ghost in my dream. Indeed what I actually saw in my dream was totally different from my parent’s interpretation. Yes I feared by seeing a face, in fact two faces, face of my father and mother. I saw them both were having a discussion about some subject, Gradually the discussion turned out to be an argument and dispute, both increased their volume not offering chance for other to respond. Mom and dad standing opposite and facing each other scolding at one another. I saw a disgusting expression in both faces, followed by an arrogant hand gestures and body language with rage. I felt so insecure and confused, thought they may come to me next and yell at me saying “it’s all because of you”. I don’t want this to happen, so I screamed, screamed as loud as I can and cried like hell so that my shrill voice pierce into their ears and hook them up.

    It worked, mom and dad parked their argument aside, looked at me and came near. I did not stop, want them to be with me, pamper me, worry about me and forget the prolonged hateful discussion. I did it, did so hard, unfortunately it went out of my control. My scream came out of dream.